So many adventures. So few times.

My photo
My life is pretty dull. I play with a toddler, watch a lot of Yo Gabba Gabba and experiment with the crock pot. I have no bed time and I find humor in Laffy Taffy jokes. Conan O'Brien is my anti-drug.

Monday, October 21, 2019

That Workout Thing

I stumbled on this article today while trying to find a single new workout move to inspire a class. But, it was this article that I clicked on, and it clicked with me, and I won’t even try to rephrase it. 


As a fitness instructor (only a year for me, as of November 1st) I’ve already had so many people my class is too hard, too intimidating. 
I’ve recently had people tell me they are “too chubby” for my classes.

Guys, stop. No, stop. Listen. 

It’s about movement. It’s about bettering oneself. It’s about setting an example for our littles, or grandlittles, or having the stamina to go for a walk with our pooches at the end of the day (or cats, but I swear I’ve never seen a cat on a leash that was happy). It’s about heart health and mental health. 
2014 Buffy, post-Tommy
Me in 2014, after the Moose was born and I was cleared for activity and I decided to document my state-of-the-body
.
 
When I see this picture, I didn’t always see a newly-postpartum woman who just carried a stressful pregnancy almost to term. I didn’t always see the almost 3-year-old that ran her ragged while the young mom was trying to not go into labor at 29+ weeks. I used to only see those wide hips and back rolls and love handles and soft triceps. All I could see is what I wasn’t: Skinny.

Now? Now I see my own body and all its badassery, ready to be loved, ready to be pushed, but also ready to snuggle kids and a neglected husband. 

For full disclosure, here I am 5 years later. 


Me on October 21st, 2019 after a fun Saturday night with beer and bbq food and friends that I don’t even slightly regret.. 

I still have thick thighs and the cellulite is forever; and I rock large calves that only fit in plus size boots. Technically, I’m chubby. When I’m not flexing my triceps flop around like chicken wings trying to fly away. I’m not at my lightest weight post-kids. I like pizza and beer and pizza with beer. But after many, many years I realized it’s less about being a skinny supermodel and more about being a super me. I’m a pretty fun mom these days. My anxiety is slipping away with every class I teach. I’m strong as hell. I have endurance beyond anything I ever dreamed... less when I’m running, but I digress. Am I the fittest in the classes I teach? Definitely no. It doesn’t matter. More than anything, I’m moving, and I want you to move, and I can help you move. 

Feel free to come sweat with me on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 9 am at Four Lakes Athletic Club in Elkhorn, WI. 

This didn’t start out as a plug for my gym or my classes, but I promise I will be so truly happy to see you!

tl;dr: I love you and I love me and I want to make everyone sweaty.

Wednesday, October 16, 2019

Butt Padding

Disclaimer: I’m known for my bluntness (although I bite my tongue more than I get credit for. Just saying.) and I make a point to not mince too many words when it comes to my blog. 

Here we go. I am on a toilet for the 10th+ time today, just after writing a horribly mean and brutal workout for tomorrow’s class, and I’m mulling over getting certified in becoming a spin instructor yet again. We have so many instructors at my gym, but I truly love the formatting and how the music works for you and how a class can change so quickly by just changing the tempo or resistance or whatever. Bla bla bla. 

So I’m shitting and mulling and I think to myself, “I know! I’ll buy myself a spin bike for at home to help me decide!” Two seconds into that endeavor - because, let’s be honest: the best research is done on the toilet - I’m changing course because 1. It costs less just to get certified and 2. We have bikes at the gym that are barely touched outside of classes as it is. I can utilize those at any time. 

I finish up for the 97th time and wash my hands and then a lightbulb! I should buy padded leggings for spin so I can enjoy a few classes more before deciding!
This seems totally obvious. Can you imagine contemplating a quick $200 spend plus 8+ hours of lecture and exercise on a tall, skinny bike while NOT having a padded butt?! Off to my good friend Amazon.

And then I find these. 




The end. 
No, seriously. I have nothing else to say. I’m crying on so many levels.


Friday, October 11, 2019

Blooms in the dark



The weather has turned in Southeastern Wisconsin. It’s gray and drizzly, with a bone-chilling breeze. Trees are getting an orange hue and my garden, or what remains, is rapidly rotting away into the fall season. I’ve recently caught wind of some shade being thrown my way behind my back, and it almost (almost) cut me deep. I almost allowed it to hurt me.

And yet this vibrant bloom emerged somewhere in the last 24 hours in my backyard, with a reminder to find the bright amidst the dreary. I hope all of you find a moment today to discover that bright spot in your life, a reminder that you ARE enough, you CAN. We are all fighting this battle together, and we can’t let the negativity win. You can create change, you can be change; you are a brilliant flower amongst weeds. 🌸 

Monday, September 23, 2019

Bad Movies with Buffy Club

The Moose has entered Kindergarten this year (AKA all day school) and Killer began 3rd grade, which has left me with... not as much free time as I expected while being a stay-at-home-mom. I’m still running around like crazy. I’m still catering to kiddo whims despite them being elsewhere. But, I’ve began something I’ve daydreamed of for years... 
Bad Movies with Buffy.

We have multiple movie theater chains in the region that offer discounted films on Tuesdays. Um, yes please? Combine that with Fandango VIP rewards (every 4 tickets = $5 off a film) and free popcorn and suddenly my world has shifted to R-rated cinematography.

Or, not. Maybe it’s a foreign film up for awards that has a cute lead. Maybe it’s a blockbuster based on a book.

All I know is that if they kids can and want to go see it, we won’t.
I’ve opened it up to friends - join me if you want, don’t if you can’t - and so far it’s been fascinating.

Sony Pictures
Week 1's viewing was Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, starring Brad Pitt, Leonardo DiCaprio and Margot Robbie (among a scattering of other big names including a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it cameo from Luke Perry) in a quirky, slow paced but entertaining story line in a “what if...” world from the brain of Quentin Tarantino. 

Annapura Pictures
Week 2 was Hustlers, based on a true story (but aren’t they all?!) chick flick hiding behind stripper crotch shots and JLo’s flawlessly tight [but I swear, toooootally natural.] umm... face. Seriously, even though it’s her show she still absolutely steals it. Lizzo and Cardi B make forgettable appearances throughout the first half and it definitely keeps you rooting for the bad buy, whoever that might be.


Material Pictures
And this week? Brittany Runs a Marathon. I have seen zero trailers for Britt, but it seems sweet and it has an R-rating so chances are there are at least some bad words to meet our strict “bad” criteria: either cheesy as hell, gory or bad-wordy.

And by strict, I mean that I made up the criteria about 30 seconds ago while typing it out, and all future choices are subject to my own very poor discretion. AKA we’re totally seeing Star Wars: Rise of Skywalker even though I’m sure I’ll see it opening day weekend.

You’re welcome. 

Saturday, September 14, 2019

Lavender Mint Lime-Infused Miracle Water




I get super bored with water. 
There, I said it. 
I know, I know. "Everyone gets bored with water", "Don’t add flavorings because it’ll only trigger cravings for sweets", yada yada yada. I've heard it all. But that doesn’t take away from the fact that I get ridiculously bored with water. 

And yeah, I’ve infused. I’ve infused more random fruits and berries and cucumbers just this last summer than most people have in their entire life. I was standing around in my kitchen and gazing out at the backyard when I hit some inspiration. 

Mint, some limes, some lavender… I felt like I was drinking some exotic post massage spa drink.



While it’s pretty self explanatory, I will break it down for you. Start with your mint... I used approximately six leaves from my mint bush and simply dropped them in the bottom of a drop-in infuser jug. 


Take a whole lime and give it five or six rolls under the palm of your hand on your counter top - this is a little magic trick to make it even juicier - and then and cut it in half. Squeeze the juice of one of the halves into your pitcher and then cut the other half into slices to add into the infuser insert. 


I have English Lavender growing in a pot for a natural mosquito repelling, but this beautiful purple perennial plant is also an edible herb! Snip the flower of one stem and after rinsing, pop the blossoms into the top of the infuser. Fill her up with water, place the pitcher of water in your refrigerator for a few hours or up to 48 hours and then enjoy!



English lavender is is believed to have antiseptic and anti-inflammatory properties. It also maybe beneficial for anxiety, insomnia, depression and restlessness.

Mint leaves soothe upset stomachs, improves digestion, reduces stress and anxiety and could improve brain function.

Limes improve digestion, may lower blood sugar, fights inflections and reduces inflammation.


Sooooo yeah, this is basically like a swollen, anxious person's miracle water. You're welcome!














Monday, July 8, 2019

Confessions of the Binger

I try to be somewhat open about the various non-senses inside my brain and inside my body. No, really. I do. Because I feel like if I’m not open then someone can’t truly get to know me. And if someone cannot except me for my flaws, they will never truly be my friend. And like all mommas, I need some rock solid friends. (So many “ands!”)

With all of that rambling, today I am putting a tiny little crease into a new page in the Buffy book. I see a psychologist for binge eating, restricting and anxiety. After many strings pulled by this amazing woman who somehow manages to punch me in the metaphorical gut each time we meet, I am heading to an eating disorder clinic. I will be meeting a new psychiatrist who will I’m sure re-diagnosed me with anxiety and ADHD and 97 other fun things. What I’m more nervous but also excited about is meeting with a dietitian therapist.

But I am also scared shitless. Just about a year ago I hit a new low weight with 40 pounds lost. That isn’t including muscle gains. I maintained for quite a while, and then things crumbled. I binge more days than not in a week. I’ve mastered the art of being out of control subtly, where my family may not even notice. I feed every emotion literally with food, but this goes well beyond just over eating. Self-control? Yeah, I do know what that is. And sometimes I have amazing self-control. In fact, myself control is so great that I can also go a day or two without consuming more calories than it is in the creamer I add to my coffee. I dabbled with intermittent fasting, but after a few weeks realized this is no better for me then completely starving myself. I know a lot of people have had great success with IF, but my brain is a special version of hot mess. I was still gaining weight and felt weaker in the process.
Whoopsies! 

What am I so scared of? Facing my realities. Having to change my habits. Letting go of any control I think I may have now. Resisting urges that my body is aching for. I’m scared of finding healthy methods to relieve stress. I’m scared of dealing with skeletons in my closet.

Also for full disclosure, I am afraid that I will open up to these people and bear my soul, admit everything and have them tell me I’m crazy and that I simply eat too much.

... Or have them tell me I need to stop drinking my glass of wine every night. Because dammit, wine.

Saturday, June 1, 2019

Oooh!

This has been said before, but I’m back! Fun things in the hopper - like my ultimate, all-time favorite matcha mint green tea latte from a neighborhood coffee shop. But maybe not because I don’t actually have the top secret recipe.
Whatever.
Stay tuned!